By Souls of Silver
You know that you are a spiritual being. You practice mindfulness, you understand your intuition, and you are often meditating to receive guidance from your spiritual guides. Not everyone is like you, but you would love to have a partner who could support you and be a part of your spiritual journey. But while you might want such a spiritual relationship, it is quite rare. What happens if your partner is not spiritual? Do you think such a relationship could survive? It is a loaded question and yes, it can trigger your anxiety about the health of the relationship that you are in. But perhaps, it’s not as bad as you might think it is.
Red flags You Need To Be Aware Of
Red flags mean that there could be something wrong with your partner that could turn the relationship to break or turn sour in the future. It brings an unhealthy dynamic into your relationship. As a spiritual being, you should not be rejected or feel worthless – rather you should be able to flourish with all the support you can get.
These are some of the red flags that you should be aware of:-
1. Your partner treats your spiritual side as a joke.
2. When you are engaging in spiritual practices your partner gets furious.
3. Your partner is often trying to stop you from engaging in any spiritual activity.
4. You face a lot of criticism about your beliefs when you are with your partner.
5. You want to ‘hide’ from your partner when you are trying to perform your spiritual practices.
6. Your partner wants you to believe in what they believe.
7. You are afraid that you will be judged for your spiritual side.
If you relate to two or more of these red flags, be extra careful – your partner is not comfortable with you and will try to put your spiritual side down. However, if none of them match your partner’s personality, then you are really lucky. At least until the first step.
What Can Happen If Your Partner Is Not Spiritual?
It can be quite depressing when you wish your partner was a spiritual being but they do not turn out to be so. As spiritual beings, we have nurtured concepts like twin-flames and soulmates and when we find someone who fails to click every part of this desire, we become disappointed. But think about it closely: are you not becoming a victim of the high ideals that you created.
When we deal with concepts like soulmates and twin-flames, we often limit them according to our perception. As a result, we put on our rose-tinted glasses and see other couples and find in them what we want from our partner. But it’s not necessary that our soulmates will have all the points we want from them. Plus, soulmates and twin flames do not even need to be spiritual.
Firstly, you should understand that being in a ‘spiritual relationship’ is not a necessity. Actually, the fact that you love each other is itself a spiritual experience. Love is the ultimate spiritual thing that we can go for. Think before you make toxic comparisons with people who post yoga pictures with their partner or go for a meditation tour: are they really in love? Even if you have differences with your partner, your partner loves you and that is enough. If a person has the capability to love you for who you are, and accepts every bit of you, then that person in innately spiritual, even if they don’t express something in that way. They just don’t know the way to express it, yet.
Ask yourself: Are Your Core Needs Being Met?
You need to know what your core needs are before you commit to something. Is it necessary for you to have a partner who is on the same belief system as you are on the subject of spirituality? If so, it’s time for you to do some soul-searching. If you are already in a relationship, see if you are happy with it after a period of five years. Are you feeling accomplished or depressed? If you feel sad, it’s completely all right – there is no problem if you want a spiritual relationship with a spiritual partner. Compatibility is the key to any relationship, and if it’s not working out, then you should not force yourself to stay in it and find yourself getting sadder each day.
Some Do’s And Don’ts
Now, you know if you can survive in a relationship with a partner who is not spiritual. But to add to it, there are certain do’s and don’ts that you need to follow to keep the relationship healthy and working:-
Don’t push beliefs: There’s nothing more hostile than a person aggressively trying to push their beliefs onto others. Be careful, and let your partner have their own beliefs as long as they don’t come in fighting opposition with you.
Don’t judge: Even if you feel like your partner is not spiritually-awake, don’t judge them because of that. The more you judge someone, the more you breed a negative attitude towards them. You don’t want that – let your partner take their time to be awake.
Don’t have wild fantasies: We are prone to lose in wild fantasies. We expect our partners to be perfect soulmates living at the same spiritual level as ourselves and we fail to accept that they could be flawed too. Accept them with their flaws and perfections – the whole thing.
Don’t rely on your partner for any kind of spiritual nurturing: Don’t expect your partner to bring you some kind of spiritual awakening. Burdening them with such a huge task is unfair, and while it might sound obvious, many spiritual people continue to do so. Try to go for a spiritual group instead.
Try to be a leader, not a preacher: Don’t try to be a preacher. Try to lead by actions and if they don’t follow, that’s totally fine.
Find similarities: You and your partner have some common ground and so you are together, right? Find out what those similarities are and focus on them.
Make sure they know they are loved: There is no alternative to it. Love is itself a spiritual experience – don’t forget to express it.
Learn from your relationship: Relationships, spiritual or not, are a learning experience – look up to your partner as a guide. Even if you are a spiritual being, it does not make your partner any less of a teacher. Your partner will show your greatest strengths and your hidden fears – learn from their reflection. Understand that you are still in a spiritual relationship even if they are not spiritual.
Honor whichever level your partner is in: Spiritual growth occurs slowly and in stages. Don’t rush it for your partner. Respect whichever stage they are in and let them grow according to their own time.
Make it a goal to meet with your partner at an equal level: Aim high – aim that one day you and your partner will be at the same spiritual level. Even though you took a different route, both of you will be together in the future.
We want to be in a spiritual relationship with people we have most of the things in common, but that’s not always going to happen. And that is completely all right. Just keep the love alive and your spiritual side will remain enriched.
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